Parking chaos

What happened?? There I was drinking, eating, chattering, watching television, playing games then all of a sudden it's time to go back to work!! groan....

Christmas has been eventful - and not always good!

Well, I'm looking forward to the New Year, Lord knows it's gotta be better than the last one.......

On a separate note, I had a new neighbour move in on 22nd December. I thought as it was so close to Christmas I'd wait til the New Year to scare...no sorry....introduce myself. It seemed that an elderly lady had moved in on her own. She hadn't got any curtains up and I smiled, a lot, as I passed her window laden with heavy shopping bags, day after day. (Just how was I going to consume all this food..)

She never smiled back

I decided that she might have a little difficulty with her eyesight...

I continued to smile

As I struggled with the shopping bags, dropping the bag with jars of exotic pickles and chutneys, whilst forcing the wrong key in the front door, I had warm thoughts that my new neighbour and I would spend a couple of hours on a Saturday or Sunday morning chattering over cups of tea and homemade ginger biscuits, organising the world at large.

On the 24th, and feeling rather festive after visiting friends and singing carols at the local hospital, I drove into the development looking forward to watching a late film with a mince pie and cup of tea. (Sad but true....) What's this? Yet another car parked in my car bay??

I walk past New Lady and smile....just in case she can see me. I see a man slumped in a chair with a bottle and glass of red wine by his side.

I smile. Just in case New Man can see.

I figure they haven't worked out which is their car bay yet, particularly as the Slovakians have been parking in their spot for weeks as it was empty and my bay seems to be the only one that has a car that actually moves these days.

I make a mental note not to get bothered and will mention it in the New Year if they haven't worked it ou by then. Besides how lovely to have a nice old couple close by. I drift off again thinking of the pleasant chats we will have over the garden wall......

On the 26th Dec I go visiting then come home and find the car in my bay has moved so I zip in, secretly hoping I won't now have to explain to them. I would just like to introduce myself as their neighbour and have a nice chat, not introduce myself then say 'remove your fucking car you moron....!!'

Well that's what I figure it'll sound like if I have to explain it my car bay......

Today I take Darling Daughter and The Boy back to their house. The Boy enjoys the ride in Nannie's Car but declares:

'Noooo - no - go - Nannie's - house.'

'Oh dear Mother, I don't think he likes his house now'

'Go - Nannies - house - now'

'He probably misses CBeebies' (BBC childrens television channel)'

'Back - Nannie's - house'

'Cheers for that Mother, now my son doesn't want to live with me either!'

Fortunately Darling Daughter is laughing as she says this and I am most relieved as the prospect of living with The Boy 24/7 would bring me out into a cold sweat.......

I get back to my place and New Neighbour's car is parked in my bay again. I decide that I will leave a friendly little note on the car. Nah, that always seems a little cowardly and I don't want New Neighbours to feel awkward.

I tap gently at their door.

New Man answers

I sincerely hope my surprise is masked in my cheery 'Hello I'm Tanie, your neighbour and I wanted to welcome you both'

'Tanie, ah, right, mmm, hello. Hello'

'I would have popped by sooner but what with Christmas I thought you wouldn't want to be disturbed'

Eee gads what HAS happened to your ear.......

'Well Mum has been very busy, there's so much for her to do'

Erm have you had earings yanked off??

'Of course moving is a major upheavil and .........

Or has something bitten it off

'NO!'

'Oh, I see'

But I don't.....

'Mum has a lot of stuff she must do. Lots'

His hand is holding the door close to his side so I couldn't see into the apartment even if I wanted to.

'Right'

And of course now he's acting weird I want to! Why hasn't New Lady come to the door? That's a bit odd isn't it?

What is this 'stuff' she has to do?

I decide to mention the car parking as New Man has burst my bubble of pleasant afternoon chit chats over the garden wall

'Is that your Renault by the way?'

'Yes'

'It's just that it's my parking bay, I believe yours is the one on the end next to the wall'

Pleeeeease don't let this deteriorate

'Yes I thought it was, I saw it had no 8 on the wall and figured it was Mum's'

'Right, well don't worry about moving the car today'

Phew this isn't too bad....

'Well I park where there's a gap okay'

Ahhhhh, mmmmm

'All the bays are allocated, one to each property. I suspect the red car in yours is your neighbour upstairs, they probably don't realise that anyone has moved in here'

Of course they do, they are just inconsiderate

'I'll park in another gap sometimes'

Oh good grief.....

I look at New Man. He is in his early 40's, bald, a bizzarely ripped ear, and helter skelter eyes.
I sigh. I was soooo hoping for a normal considerate neighbour!

2008 WILL be good, really it will......